The Rollar Coaster that is my life.

So I went to McMaster Friday having travelled on the Highway with a VERY full bladder to get there and be asked by the technician, "why do you have a full bladder?" Well let's see, "I'm here for an Ultrasound on my Ovaries to look for cysts" ya know the one my NeuroSurgeon ordered!? Well the technician consults the requisite and we verify all of the information to make sure it's mine and sure enough I'm not there for my ovaries but rather to have an ultrasound on my liver. *sighs* My liver? Yeah I know, I have no clue either, but the technician must have felt so bad for me that she actually did an ultrasound on my ovaries since she said with a full bladder they should be able to get a good picture of them and sure enough she did. She then let me pee, THANK GOD! Seriously what person in their right mind says, "fll your bladder and let's press on it!" seems kind of cruel doesn't it?! Anyways after I was able to pee she then did an ultrasound of my liver. So I had a COMPLETE abdominal ultrasound and will review those results on Feb 25 when I meet with the Drs again.

I recieved notification of my first Observation MRI which is April 11 at Juravinski. I had been going to Hamilton General Hospital for my MRI's but it appears they now have an MRI machine at the Cancer Center which is good because now it's "one stop shopping" for Cancer patients. lol that sounds horrible doesn't it? But I meet with my Oncologist on April 21 for the results of the MRI and to say I'm nervous is an understatement. I was talking to my Hubby about it and trying to pinpoint it but I think there is a part of me that is waiting for the hammer to fall, waiting for the Dr to say, "well we gave observation a try but now we need to do Chemo." I still have to remember one thing at the end of the day: I am a Cancer Patient, and those words are very hard to swallow. I was fortunate enough to have an AMAZING team of surgeons that operated on me and I have chosen as my Treatment, Observation but I could have instead have chosen Chemotherapy & Radiation as it was an option presented to me. Infact I was told that if at anytime I change my mind and wish to do Chemo & Radiation that I can do that as well, but unless it is absolutely necessary it isn't something I'm going to do.

Of course I try to remain as optomistic as possible and hope for the best, but this waiting is something that sucks big time! In fact the Neuro Oncologist I met with in December said that Observation is something alot of people can't do becaues emotionally and psychologically it messes with them and I get that. For the last 2 months I've been wanting my first MRI to come in hopes it would get here, the results would be good and than it would be over and I'd wait another 4 months, and now that it's in the near future I'm anxious about it. So please, keep the prayers and positive thoughts coming because I can definately use each and every one of them.

~Tara

Appointments.

So I meet with my Family Dr this friday morning and than I have an appointment at McMaster in the evening for an Ultrasound. This appointment is in regards to cysts on my ovaries that I've had for years but no one ever did anything about. So I go and get a Brain Tumor and for some reason the cysts on my ovaries come up in conversation with an RN because my Nuerosurgeon requested some tests to see if I have PCOS. Yes, it's all a weird weeved little web lol but I suppose once this is done and over with I will more than likely have had a physical from head to toe from the inside out! Or as my Aunt Lynn says, I'm gonna start glowing with all the MRI's I have had and will continue to lol

It's up and running.

I'm happy to say that the Hope,Believe,Fight website is up and running after final tweeking. Feel free to pass the link on to anyone that may need some help in locating Cancer Resources whether in Canada or the United States.

Head pain galore!

This week has been a rough week with my head at times feeling like it is going to explide! I am certain it is pain/pressure due to surgery but I do need to speak to my Dr about it soon. It's quite an intense pain throughout my head, I actually call it "skull pain" because that's what it feels like, it feels like it is travelling through my skull. I also ended up getting the stomach bug that's been going around so it's been a crappy week to say the least. I am however at least feeling somewhat better so that's a good thing! I have 2 appointments at McMaster in February and I'm sure they will be interesting as I will be getting some test results back. For now I'm just taking the Tylenol when I need it and trying to rest as well but it's quite hard to lay down and sleep when any pressure on your head just intensifys it all. Oh well, fake it till ya make it right!?

~Tara

3 months

It's been 3 months since my surgery, yep just 3 months. Alright who is sick of me saying "it's been..." every month? lol Well guess what? I don't care! Seriously, each day is a gift and each month is a milestone for me. I've continued to do well, infact better than my Drs have thought which is good. My only real issue that I still have from the surgery is that I still do have double vision but it isn't a constant thing and it does come and go so it makes it bearable. My perifrial vision is still buggered a bit but when I see my Opthamologist in March I'll see what "official" progress I've made in that area. My head seems soft on the right side it's really weird and I definately need to bring it up to my Dr the next time. Inbetween where the incision scars are it's as though my head is moist. Sounds gross and doesn't make sense right? lol Well the only way to describe it is gross so bear with me k!? Anyone who has taken a bath or shower and got out without pumicing their feet knows how that dried up calousy bit feels on say your heel, it's that weird texture, ya follow? Well imagine that texture but in a nice patch covering one side of your head, that's how it feels inbetween my incisions. It's a constant moist feeling, not wet and it's not damp but you can feel it's not normal dried scalp, it's really odd and it just won't seem to dry up like your scalp should.

I know it's only been 3 months since my surgery and sometimes it feels like it's been a lot longer so I figure I should be further along in the healing process so this may be normal, but at the same time it may not be so I definately need to speak to my Dr. But really those are my only real issues at the moment which I suppose is a good thing! I have a few appointments next month at McMaster but thankfully I only had the 1 this month!

Cancer SUCKS!

We all know someone that has been touched by Cancer, you may have even been touched by it yourself but whatever the case may be: CANCER SUCKS! As you all know on October 21, 2010 I had a Malignant Tumor removed from my Brain, my surgeons got the whole tumor but not everyone is as lucky and not just with Brain tumors but with other Cancers as well. One of those people would be my friend Tammie whose brother Ricky, at just 25 years old he is losing his one and a half year battle with Colon Cancer, a disease that use to be uncommon in young people is sadly becoming all too common. And then I think of little Molly Campbell from Vancouver Island who just before Christmas this year and at just 28 days old was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia and is currently undergoing daily painful chemotherapy. Stories like these not only break my heart but they make me so mad, CANCER SUCKS!!

Back in September I went from a normal day to day routine to finding out I had a cancerous brain tumor, to having major surgery and then being told I no longer have any tumor in me. The last few months have been trying, emotional and even life changing and that's what brings me to this post. When faced with something so serious you do ALOT of thinking, you wonder if you are dieing, you wonder if you've done anything in life that mattered, you wonder why you've wasted all of the years you have on frivulous things but most of all you wonder how things will be different when you come out on the other side. Well I'm about to tell you you how things have changed for me. First of all you all have been so wonderful and supportive of me during this time that I feel blessed beyond words, so thank you. And I now more than ever have a hate-on for Cancer and wondered what I could do that could help someone else that is facing cancer and that brings me to this: www.hopebelievefight.com

When I was diagnosed and also in early stages of recovery the one thing I did was read and I read anything and everything available to me to find out about cancer and also about what resources were abailable to me from the government and it was hard to find this information. Not to mention the fact that I didn't physically feel up to spending time looking for it anyways but it was just plain hard to track down! So I decided that my way of giving back and paying it forward would be to create a website with multiple cancer resources listed in one place. On the website you can find anything from local cancer centres to government disability programs, to lists ofcancer fighting foods to words of hope. And so for the last few weeks I've been compiling information that I already had and searching out new information that I needed and designed a website that has Cancer Resources listed by Province in addition to many other things. I hope that by placing all of this information in one spot online that it helps someone that is facing cancer and maybe makes their journey a little more bearable.

While the site contains alot of information specific to Canada it also contains other great information as well and has been recieved well already as we've recieved visitors and messages from all around the world. If you can pass this link on I would appreciate it, however my ultimate hope is that one day we won't need resources like this, we need to take out this violent predator that has no regard for human life and we need to find a cure!

~Tara

Hope,Beleive,Fight
for a world without cancer.


You can read an article on Ricky Here.

You can follow Baby Mollys Journey Here.

My NeuroSurgeon and my Ovaries?

I had the first of what will be many visits at McMaster Hospital in Hamilton today and met with a Nurse practitioner to go over my Medical History, get some bloodwork done and partake of the ever dreaded peeing in a cup. Speaking of peeing in a cup I want to know why they don't make those cups a little more "female friendly" for us girls that have to squat! Anyways I was quite surprised when the nurse said to me, "did you know that Dr. Kachur requested you be tested for PCOS?", I wasn't aware of this request and kind of confused by it too. For those that may not know or remember, Dr. Kachur is the Head NeuroSurgeon that performed my operation and why he's requesting tests to be done on my Ovaries to check for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome is beyond me lol. I know that when I was wheeled into the Operating room I asked the Surgical Team if they all had their morning coffees and they had (hey it was an early operation I wanted to make sure they were awake!) and they made sure that I hadn't had a cup of joe though and I really needed one! But I also told them to feel free to do what they want to me once I was knocked out, I'm thinking that may not have been the best thing;) I can't make the connection between a Brain Tumor and my ovaries so I find it quite entertaining to say the least.

So now aside from my many other appointments at McMaster I must return to undergo an Ultrasound *sighs*